The wiffleball strike nows seem interminable, and angry fans, media and wiffleball professionals have all blamed Breck Dockstader (or “Brock Dockstader” as The New York Times calls him in every wiffleball article it writes; or “B.C. Stader” as Bill Simmons on espn.com’s Page 2 calls him).
But Andrew Spainhower, longtime wiffleball journeyman and suspected user of illegal fireworks, stands up for his friend and roommate Dockstader.
“Obviously we’re underpaid,” he said. “I’ve been in the league for nearly five years, and I still have to have a roommate to make ends meet.”
Commissioner Norm disagrees.
“Breck owns a sizable portion of the Verizon Wireless Empire, why does he need a roommate?” the commissioner asks.
Meanwhile, fans have grown wary of the excuses.
Three fans–Megan Knell, Paula Brooks and Tina Reed–have spearheaded a class action lawsuit against Dockstader.
“We want wiffleball,” said Knell.
“We need wiffleball,” said Brooks.
“We’d like apiece of that Dockstader fortune,” said Reed.
